Category: list

July moments…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay

I have procrastinated this July lesson post because I’m just not in the mood. I’m tired. I’m stressed. In these two ways, I am just like the majority of us… I get it. This month felt long, short, and like it dragged on forever while it also somehow sped by in a blink. My biggest adult lesson may eternally be that the passage of time makes no sense. I thought I was getting the hang of it until 2020 hit and messed us all up.

  • I learned that I may get super tired of drinking water so often, but when our water cooler died I became a woman who has never craved water more… make it make sense.
  • I took our dog Elenor and our cat Darcy to the vet this month. They each needed vaccinations and our vet is a bit of a drive. What’s the big deal? I thought… The cat is in a carrier. It will be fine. It, in fact, was very barely fine and I’m still regretting the decision days later. I learned never to do that again. Separate visits and making the drive twice are the new way to go.
  • I’ve been planning my book launch event, in another state. It seemed easy enough, but it turns out it is very complicated and the next time I plan to travel home, it will not be for an event. I’ve learned my lesson.
  • I released a small number of book boxes for my up-and-coming memoir Girls, Assassins & Other Bad Ideas. I am obsessed with this activity–it’s safe to say it is bringing me life right now… BUT while I figured I’d planned far more than would sell, it turns out I didn’t plan near enough. I am deeply touched, ecstatic, and humbled by the whole thing. I’ve learned not to sell myself short and to not be afraid to go for it. (May we all learn this lesson!)
  • I’ve learned to do the spontaneous thing sometimes. I have practiced spontaneity in several areas of my life this month and haven’t regretted it yet. In fact, it made the best memories!

July Bests…

  • Movie (New): NOPE
  • Movie (Older): Red Dawn
  • TV Binge: Stranger Things 4:2
  • Read: Every Summer After by Carley Fortune… Pretty predictable but also nostalgic, fun, and a great summer read.

that pesky halfway mark…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay

Every time I sit down to contemplate the lessons a month held, things feel so much heavier than they did the month prior. I’m not loving that trend. While it is completely unrealistic, as we’re now halfway through this year of our Lord 2022, I’m going to hope this B:Side is gentler…

June was a month. A MONTH. I’m really showing my age when I say this statement, but it is once again so profoundly true: This month was an eternity long, but also how is it already the end of June???

Things I learned (or relearned) over the past thirty days:

  • I do actually enjoy going to the movies. Hear me out, anyone who has known me for any length of time has known me as a movie lover. Pre-Covid, going to the movies was something we did OFTEN. Sometimes more than once a week. When routines hit pause, we reevaluated and started to wonder if we still loved this activity. Even getting back into it, well over a year later, often felt uncomfortable. Today I can so I do enjoy it but as something special. Once or twice a month is more than enough for me. I don’t want to go if it’s not a movie that I am seriously excited to see.
  • We can disagree with people we love, about hot-topic issues, and still be respectful. I don’t love this “unfollow and block” mentality, it’s gross and dismissive. Have the hard conversations–show that respect. If you can’t come to a place where you each can exists in love and differences, then take that drastic step. We’ve all had different experiences, and we will majorly disagree with our people sometimes.
  • I’m REALLY glad So You Think You Can Dance is back. While I’m not a dancer, I am a veteran series watched and suspect I may be more articulately qualified to judge than Leah Remini is. (Fox, if you need a stand-in–CALL ME!)
  • Raccoons are jerks. Or at least the one raccoon (we suspect it was one) who slashed the screens of our sunroom to get in and eat the cat food is. How are we kicking off July? By attempting to repair the damage and raccoon-proof our favorite room that is currently out of commission.
  • Sometimes it is essential to take a mental health day, (even when you work for yourself at home) lay on the couch, and binge-watch something. The world will whisper this is a lazy thing to do, but listen… the world needs to mind its own business. Rest can look like a million different things and only YOU get to say what’s right for you.
  • Ice cream for dinner is acceptable. Period. I am prepared to die on this hill.
  • That the world was not ready for Kate Bush music when I was a kid like it is now. I’m here for this revival, though I was also here for it when I was nine.
  • Conservative Purity viewpoints are solely responsible for things like porn addiction. I’d go so far as to say this may be true for a large portion of assaults on women as well. I realized this will be a controversial viewpoint for many, but the reality is the objectification of women is driven from this hyperfixation.
  • Too much time in the summer heat can cause a fever for me. It seems silly, but I experienced it after the Lumineer’s concert that was a few weeks ago, in the middle of a heatwave, and again after attending PrideFest last weekend. BIZARRE… but also, learning these things about the way my chronic illness manifests itself empowers me to know how to act, plan, and what to expect later.
  • Finding creative ways to partner with small, women-owned businesses is my absolute favorite thing!

As we head into the second half of our year, may we love kindly, hold space for others, and treat ourselves gently…

XOXO,

M

shelved…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay1 Comment

In March of 2020, having oodles of newfound time on my hands, I approached my 44th birthday in a far different headspace than I had before. I had resolved, as we entered the new decade, that the year was going to be an extraordinary one for me. I sought out all sorts of symbolic things in the numbers (2s and 4s) and where specific dates fell in relation to the calendar.

While the year WAS extraordinarily significant for me, it was NOTHING like I had imagined.

Because I was celebrating my birthday by canceling a trip to NYC to see a musical I love, which was set to be in previews, I decided to focus on creativity. Specifically, why I had stopped being super creative, and how could I use the endless lock-down time to get it back. I created an ambitious list, which became a journey itself.

For one, some of those things– penned out of the pre-covid mindset– would no longer be things I’d want to do, and that’s ok.

As someone who fell in love with interior design and making spaces cozy and beautiful, at a very young age, I was sad to see that I’d reached a point where I just didn’t care about that anymore. Well, that’s not true… It wasn’t that I didn’t CARE as much as I was deeply homesick, operating on the BRINK of overwhelm/stress, and was often so frustrated with our tiny cottage and the lack of inspiration it seemed to hold. In an effort to combat that, one of the goals on my list became to redecorate the gallery ledges in our living room, every month for a year. The rules were that it had to be an intentional, low-cost change.

I never expected this idea to grow the way it did. Not only am I still doing the ledges over two years later, but this simple thing inspired lots of people to take space in their homes to do the same. It also fed my creativity, lessened my overwhelm, and I began to do small things here and there all over our home. Eventually, this led to us relandscaping our very jungly yard, and now the idea and project list are unending–which I personally love.

I created the Shelf Series (in my Etsy shop) as a fun and low-cost way to help others in this journey. One of my favorite things about this now habitual act is that it created an opportunity for me to connect with and support other print artists.

The journey over these past two+ years has been a rollercoaster one. So much division, so much hatred, so much tragedy… but out of this time has also come so much incredible creativity and so much growth. Wherever your life falls, in that spectrum, I hope that you’re able to find intentional and small ways to bring magic, healing, and creativity into your space.

XOXO,

M

but also…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay

Yesterday we spent some time in the dirt, though to be honest, this was more Chw than me. I got to assume the role of lovely assistant and it was so nice. The sun was glorious, our trees are finally admitting it’s Spring, and the birds were serenading us with magic.

Yesterday felt a bit like hope, which is a little odd considering yesterday was also Mother’s Day the “holiday” that most women of my generation struggle with and would push through the meatgrinder if we could… even so, out there in the sunshine and dirt (well, dirt adjacent for me) was hope filled. I chatted with our neighbor about work, we traveled to the hardware store to load up on bricks, and we sat together designing a bird bath plan because just throwing it in the yard feels too easy.

I’ve wanted a bird bath for so long. My mother had one in our front yard when I was growing up and I always felt bad that she didn’t want water in in. When it rained it would fill up, but we lived in southern New Mexico– there wasn’t a lot of rain. Instead, the dry basin would crack beneath the intense desert sun. As I’ve grown into a full-level adult I’ve developed a love of birds. Our yard is a mini-paradise for so many different types of birds and I absolutely love sitting in our sunroom sipping a glass of iced tea and watching them. The feral cats we feed also enjoy watching them, but I have made it known that we provide food to them for free, they will get yelled at if they go after a bird. I am team bird 100% of the time.

So far this plan seems to be working, or at least thats what I tell myself.

I never thought I’d be one for sitting around and dreaming of things like my own bird bath or spending lazy weekend mornings watching those tiny little once-dinosaurs do their thing. Even so, they amaze me. I guess in this way, I amaze me too. I love the peace and simplicity of this way of living, and I’m so grateful that I leveled up into the adult that I have.

Flower beds, yard work, birds, and sun tea… these are all difinitive summer kisses that I love. In some ways I feel like we lost last summer completely, to the pandemic, and so I’m present and ready to embrace this one completely!

I have my happy little list of summer things I’m excited about and thought I’d share. Enthusiasm can be contageous so, whenever you read this, I hope my fan-girling of summer brings you a smile and, at least, an ounce of joy!

  • Movies! We have an outdoor theater set up in our yard and I can not wait to open it up to friends and neigbors as we resume outdoor movie nights!
  • BUT ALSO, there are big -screen movies releasing that I’m so excited about. We used to be avid movie goers and that definitly isn’t the case anymore. Even so, I am so excited for Baz Luerman’s Elvis Biopic! Almost equally as excited for the new Jurassic World and Top Gun sequel!
  • Our area has lovely outdoor garden concerts and I’m so ready for those to resume. Weather permitting, they became our favorite way to spend a Monday evening in summers past.
  • BUT ALSO, We are going to seeshows for The Lumineers and (of course!) Twenty One Pilots this summer. I’m beyond thrilled for both of those adventures!
  • We are so lucky to have a gorgeous beach and several outdoor areas. I can’t wait to get in some good lake time, forest bathing, hiking, and picnics!
  • BUT ALSO, secretly hoping we’ll be able to get in some ocean beach time too. We’ll see. (fingers crossed!)
  • We love supporting our local food truck vendors! They come out for the summer concert series, and we keep tabs on where they’ll be popping up around town!
  • BUT ALSO, we have a Food Truck Ralley every summer. In years past they have turned the weather into Tornado Warnings/Watches so along with delicious food, live music, and the very best fresh squeezed lemonade, there’s that excitement!
  • New summer sunnies and a new floppy hat are thrilling me to no end! Summer toes, sandles, pool time and my cute pool wrap with fringe are really exciting me about the warm weeks to come!
  • BUT ALSO, after three long years away, I get to go home for a few days this summer and I can’t wait! I’m already composing lists of my favorite places to go and my best people!

Moral of this summer-hopeful tale is this: Wherever your life is at today, there is what is happening, BUT ALSO there is always hope.

The numbers don’t lie, but the eggs might…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay

Is it fair to say that February may have been the longest string of twenty-eight days in the history of man? I mean, that’s probably not true (a matter of perspective I can imagine) and also from a scientific standpoint probably makes no sense. All the same, from where I’m typing it would seem that February lasted 127 years and I am entering into the month of March to celebrate what would then be my 173rd birthday. (also, to be fair, I feel I have aged so much in these past few years that maybe I feel 173…)

If you’re some sort of rapid math genius then you may have assessed that I’m turning 46 in a handful of weeks. 46. I didn’t repeat it because this number freaks me out–on the contrary, I don’t even get what the big deal about age is anymore. I had my meltdown when I turned 25, and then my worst birthday ever when I turned 40. To be fair, they were all pretty crappy, for the most part, until that one.

No, I repeated “46” because it gave me pause to realize it has only been six years since that horror of a milestone day. Those six years have really dragged on, proving that time must not always “speed by” the older we get. I guess considering almost half of that time has been measured through the pandemic lens, and included the longest January ever, followed by the 127-year long month of February…

Listen, there are a lot of numbers in this post. Some are spelled out in an attempt to distract myself from the fact that if I look at these lines just right it will feel like a story problem from my fifth-grade math book. These numbers are stressing me out… Math is clearly not my thing. Even the appearance of math makes me antsy…

One thing I don’t take for granted is the appreciation I’ve gained for birthdays, my own included, and have traded in the decades of horrible ones for better ones since the disastrous 40th. I believe we are never too old to learn, which brings me to the actual (only slightly numerical) point of this post:

Things I learned in February…

  1. Over the process of working with my publishing team and editor, I feel I’ve gained more and more confidence in my work–specifically my memoir.
  2. While I wouldn’t say i learned how to watercolor, I did spend time playing with them and definitly feel less intimidated than I did before.
  3. That there is an actual Carpe Diem day. It was February 26th. Not only is this special to me because Dead Poet’s Society has always been a favorite film of mine, but I also feel this matters because so often we choose to stay comfortable over daring to do things… As we sink farther and farther into that zone, we tend to achieve less and less. Seizing the day is something I hope I aspire to do–even when I really am turning 173. (to be clear, PLEASE GOD NO. I do not wish to live that long.)
  4. Definitly since the start of this year, but continuing into February, I’ve been working on learning to embrace my creative desires and focus on “play over results.” In doing so, I’m trying several different mediums, looking at classes, and really enjoying myself.
  5. In February I continued my education in embracing that I am a child of the moon. I restructured my entire schedule to observe the waxing and waning cycles of the moon’s phases and it was interesting. Due to things beyond my control, I won’t be able to observe these cycles as strictly in March, but I still plan to be intentional about them.
  6. According to Google, one can tell an organic egg has gone bad when it floats in a bowl of water. I don’t know about all of that, but I did learn that if an egg smells really eggy, it is not good. Maybe this is baseless information and I’m full of it, I don’t know… but when Chw made scrambled eggs one day, and I (from an entirely different room) smelled a STRONG eggs smell the second he started, my stomach turned and I couldn’t eat them. A few days later, I went to fry up an egg for a bowl of ramen and the second I cracked the egg (the NO WHITES egg that sent horrified chills up my spine!) that same smell about knocked me back ten feet. I couldn’t eat the egg, (sad ramen). I replaced the entire batch and we had eggs over the weekend and I did not smell that smell or get nauseated. This may all be baseless information but I don’t care. If I ever smell that putrid scent again, I will not be eating the eggs…
  7. HOWEVER, in my EGG-UCATION (ha!!! I know… Lame. But also, kind of funny…) I also learned that the brighter the yolk color the more natural and healthy the hen’s diet was, thus meaning the paler yolks are the less healthy.
  8. I attending an amazing workshop and learned how to not only give myself an “energy massage”, but how to give one to someone else. Fascinating stuff!
  9. I had my first King Cake… and listen, if people are binging on these before Lent, I understand the idea behind abstaining from sugar. WOW, that was the SWEETEST cake I’ve ever put in my mouth!
  10. Even though there are increasingly terrible things happening in the world, as well as in many of our lives and the lives of our people, it is CRUCIAL that we honor and celebrate our good moments, small wins, and progress.