beautiful, confession, entertainment, gifts, gratitude, home, journey, Uncategorized

It’s friday, I’m in love…

I have seven sleeps until I get to share my bed with my gypsy husband once again! I cannot wait! In the meantime, here are a few of the highlights/obsessions of my week… (quick disclaimer: This week is a little heavy on the TV… I totally want to blame the cool autumn evenings, but we’ve got sweltering evenings, so I can’t.)

1.) This is Us! It’s back, you guys! It is like an old friend (or family of friends) finally returned from vacation and we laughed, and cried and they gave me the little trinket they bought in that little shop because they were thinking of me… (note: I need friends.)

2.) The recording of the Broadway show Dear Evan Hansen… Seriously, I am obsessed! I adore Ben Platt and I want to see this show so badly! If you love shows, seriously, give it a listen.

3.) The Murder of Laci Peterson. Oh my gosh. I don’t even know; I can’t even… A dear friend encouraged me to watch it and hesitantly I obeyed. I am not a lover of true crime anything. At one point my BFF admitted I was crazy to be watching such things while I was home alone. I assured her it is “so interesting and not at all scary!”, which was true, until episode 6. Let’s just say 1 a.m. dog walking felt a little reckless, and not in a fun way. (1 a.m, of course, because I couldn’t stop watch the show. Ugh.)

4.) I adore this story so much! (i also adore the author, but that’s a different point all together!) I loved how universal this lesson is, because at 41 years old, I still find myself relearning this lesson…

5.) Go Macro vegan bars. Have you guys tried these? I was super hesitant because, typically, if my protein bar isn’t going to taste like a snickers bar, I’m likely not going to eat it. (I am mostly joking here, but I am pretty picky.) These taste super healthy, (at least the ones I’ve had) BUT not at all in a bad way. I actually really loved them! Now if I could find them for less than $2.69 a piece…

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chronic illness, confession, entertainment, fibro, gratitude, journey, rant, self care

I totally hold Joss Whedon responsible…

On Monday I had a pretty rough day. It was one of those days where, if it could go wrong, it did. I had a few rocky appointments/meetings, followed by some pretty not-awesome (but also not terrible) news from my doctor’s office. The thing about the doctor was that they called when I was getting a massage…

I realize this is likely the point in the story where I’ve lost your sympathy vote. Massage? This girl is complaining about her bad day AND she had a massage??? Yeah, I know how it sounds. Please though, allow me to explain. While it may not be everyone who suffers from a chronic illness’ journey, I can tell you that massages are a necessary evil for me. I have to book in advance because of the type of therapist I have to see. When that date rolls around, it doesn’t matter if I am in a Fibro flare up or not, I have to go. How my body receives the massage very much depends on if I am flaring or not, and what the weather outside is like. Let’s take yesterday, for example… It is really, unseasonably hot in Michigan right now and so my body HATES me. My therapist had to spend an extra 15 minutes just to get my neck and shoulder muscles to loosen a little. My lower back has been miserable ever since the massage and I’ve juggled a headache. THIS is more common than not, how I am post massage. So it’s not really a fun thing.

Anyway, I digress… As I am (slowly) dressing from my session, I decide to listen to the voicemail my doctor’s nurse left. What followed was a very ominous message which left me wondering if this was when they share that I only have a few weeks to get my affairs in order. So yeah, I’m fine,(whew!) but the massage AND the anxiety when 90 minutes passed, after I returned the call and left a message, with no word, took their toll on me.

The day had a few other bumps. Over all I just felt drained physically, mentally and emotionally.

Tuesday was different though. I resolved that I would approach every situation differently. (There must have been something off, in the air, yesterday because people were NASTY!) What I found, instead, was myself silently (and often comically) observing life’s quirky bits…

  • like the conveyer belt, at the super market, ate an elderly woman’s $20 bill. Chaos ensued and I was delivered about a hundred apologies and treated with kid gloves as they attempted to solve the error. Is this the sort of thing someone might get really angry about, I wondered. Instead, I had a lovely little chat with Killian the clerk, who must be nearing his 11th birthday, he was so young.  At one point he shared that he really loved old horror movies, and when he offered up movies from the early two-thousands as evidence, I kindly took my receipt and headed for the door. Oh Killian, sweet small boy, I could be your great-grandmother… I really couldn’t, but that is how I felt. (I also bought a bottle of wine, which he did not card me for, so he may feel the same. Silly, Killian.)
  • Tuesdays at 10:20 a.m. are apparently a major traffic time at the USPS. Who knew? I purposefully avoided it on Friday and Monday because I knew my business there would take some time. People were over all carefree, so I clearly made the right choice as everyone in public, Monday, was behaving like they were straight from a freak episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
  • Starbucks drive thru employees tend to lean strongly one way or the other. You have the ones made of cardboard, who seem more bot than person. Those are kind of fun, sort of. (except probably on Monday. No one was fun on Monday. Seriously.) The other side of the spectrum would be the overly chatty ones. The ones who feel the need to divulge very personal information, OR take credit for your purchase. Of course, I am generalizing… Not ALL of them are like this, but I have encountered one or the other more often, as of late. Today I ordered a peach infused green tea. This is not a drink I am new to, and yet, this barista guy decided to congratulate me on my choice. He was confident I would really like it, and that he is always telling people to order this very drink,and they don’t, so it made his day that I had chosen it and that if I did not like it, come back and he would recommend something else. Um, ok, buddy… Pretty sure it is bound to taste like the other 350* I’ve ordered this summer (*slight exaggeration).
  • Tuna. Tuna… I have loved Tuna forever. Grew up eating Tuna casserole, Tuna sandwiches… I have appreciated Tuna because it is such a great source of protein. I tried to eat Tuna at lunch and got sick. the smell, sight and taste of it is so unbelievably repulsive to me- instantaneously. What? Why? I feel like I have lost a friend. (a smelly friend, but hey- I love unconditionally.)
  • People really do stand in super market aisles, lost in confusion. Maybe this has been me at times, but I have never really noticed it in others. Today’s trip found eleven patrons in such circumstance. (Then again, with the conveyor belt eating money and the talk of “super old horror movies” (SHM!) I am suddenly wondering if Joss Whedon is responsible for this silly day too…)

I have produce sitting in my fridge waiting for me to chop, dice and stir it all into a big pot of soup. The lover of fall in me is irritated and antsy that such rituals have not begun. It is nearly 100 degrees outside and my autumn loving soul just cannot understand. I hear rumors that fall will descend upon us tomorrow and I am holding out hope, stock pot and ladle in hand. (At this point I am going to blame Joss Whedon for the weather too, because, why not? It seems like something he would write.)

There is a spider crawling on the outside pane of my office window. I have killed a half a dozen (after spraying, mind you) inside, over the past week. Apparently the spiders are too on their autumn clocks and heading in-doors because it’s time. (either that or- I hesitate to say it- we are slowly being overrun by arachnids. Dang it, Joss… knock it off already.)

In all fairness, today it is misting out, cooler, and absolutely glorious…

entertainment, family, friendship, gratitude, journey, parenting, self care

Words to live by…

During the Emmy’s on Sunday evening, I took to twitter to solve a mystery. I had to learn what Elizabeth Moss was saying to her mother… I HAD to. (It is things like this which drive me.)

Earlier in the evening it had been Alexander Skarsgård’s lovely words to his own mother which began the evenings trend, much to the delight of mothers tuning in everywhere. When Lizzy’s comment got censored though, my curiosity sky rocketed and I could not let it go.

So, what did she say? She thanked her mother for teaching her that she could be kind AND a fucking badass. 

Amazing really.

I know profanity is a sensitive topic for many, and I apologize if what I am about to say offends anyone, but if my child ever stood in front of anyone and gave me such an incredible credit- my motherhood would be made.

I want to be like Lizzy Moss’ mom, when I grow up.

I want to teach my daughters and son, my grandsons and granddaughter that they need to treat everyone with immense kindness, but to believe in themselves and have such internally rooted confidence that they kick ass in everything they try to muddle through. (And please note, success is not the same thing. It is possible to completely rock all you do, and still fail at things. Failure is learning, failure is growth. It is the wallowing that keeps us down, not the failing.)

Before this part of her speech I had just remarked that, though I have never actually met Elizabeth, she truly does seem like a genuinely kind person. I also had pointed out that her name had been referenced, in gestures of gratitude and accreditation, from the stage just 1- 2 times more frequently than Oprah’s and Oprah’s name was mentioned a lot. ( i mean, she is Oprah)

This small story within the awards show, (ironically, a show for and about stories) became a large and multi-chaptered one for me. In these few words, and the expression she conveyed as she looked to her mother to speak them, portrayed a life time of love and relationship. I am sure there were door slamming days when this now seemingly sweet girl likely told her beloved mother she hated her. I am sure there were hard teenage daughter times, just like in nearly every home across our great nation at one time or another. But those slams and screams do not comprise their story, nor do they do nearly as accurate a job as her one beautiful sentence tonight did.

Forget the dresses and hairstyles, the borrowed jewels or petty little dramas between celebrities, the meat of the moments are when we see these larger than life celebrities as what they really are: people. And this mother’s lesson is one we all need to put into practice and live our own lives by…

beautiful, books, chronic illness, entertainment, fibro, friendship, gratitude, journey, Lately, list

It’s friday, I’m in love…

I would love to delve into the Cure lyrics here and say that I don’t really care if Monday is actually grey, but I’d be lying. This whole week was a little grey honestly. My husband is away on business and I’m missing him. On top of that there has just been sickness, fibro crap, a dental nightmare and odds and end little things that would bury me alive, if I let them.

(I won’t!)

Instead I’m focussing on the great things, and I’ll be honest, I have had to practice being aware and think a lot more about what this week’s little list might look like…

1.) Portugal. The Man... Heard them? While they aren’t new to my radar (think indie alternative meets totally fresh and amazing) this week I found myself gravitating more to their music that I have before. Big awesome, and very much the bulk of the soundtrack carrying my week.

2.) Sweet potato dog chips. Basically I believe they are dried sweet potatoes. We tried making them a few years back and it was a bust. I became so jaded from the experience that I swore my dogs would never eat sweet potatoes again. (just kidding, that’s not true) We did recently pick up a large bag of them and I can honestly say both dogs love them far better than treats. The super nice thing is that 3.5 month old Elenor will stay “busy” on one for a good chunk of time, giving me a small window of productivity.

3.) This book! While I am pretty new to the Enneagram, this book seems to be the perfect launching pad and I am loving it!

4.) You guys… This week I stumbled upon a 55 gram of protein shake, (55!!!) that tastes like dessert. Seriously, it was decadent. (Nutri-bullet: 1 chocolate Premier protein, 2 scoops Chocorite Peanut Butter protein, 5 ice cubes, 1 banana (potassium!!!) and listen for the Angel’s chorus…

5.) Last but not least, this movie! I was lucky enough to catch a showing, earlier in the week, with a friend. We live in a time when new movies come and go so fast, and most of the time they have the feel of mass production products over art. I realize this film is bombing critically, and as a former critic I get it. Here’s the thing though, critics pick faults by nature- it’s the job. (I can also tell you that watching movies, as a critic, sucks.) I know that average viewers aren’t loving it by the majority either. I think maybe it is marketed as something it isn’t… I think the Sweet Home Alabama fans are shouting from their rooftops “FINALLY!!!” and flocking to see it, expecting Sweet Home Alabama. It isn’t. (not even in the same genre) It is Home Again. Not better, but very, very different. Also, it is very, very beautiful…

So that’s my week… Other bright spots are the constant laugh-til-tears over Elenor and her huge personality… She’s going to her first sleepover tonight and I do declare, I’m going to miss this girl like crazy! Tell me about your week…

entertainment, family, holiday, Lately, list

It’s Friday, I’m in love…

1.) Christmas is merely a few months away and the trailer for The Man Who Invented Christmas has me super excited! It looks amazing, doesn’t it??? I mean, seriously, we all love Dan Stevens, and it just looks so great! The Man Who Invented Christmas tells of the magical journey that led to the creation of Ebenezer Scrooge (Christopher Plummer), Tiny Tim and other classic characters from A Christmas Carol. Directed by Bharat Nalluri (MISS PETTIGREW LIVES FOR A DAY), the film shows how Charles Dickens (Dan Stevens) mixed real life inspirations with his vivid imagination to conjure up unforgettable characters and a timeless tale, forever changing the holiday season into the celebration we know today.

I seriously watch it over and over again…

2.) Speaking of watching… IT. I was lucky enough to catch an early screening of IT this week and I loved it! I was a little nervous, to tell the truth. Scary movies and I aren’t usually buds, but this movie is so great!

3.) I am not one of those girls who goes crazy over pumpkin spice everything… That being said, this Pumpkin Spice and Vanilla Chai lotion is UNBELIEVABLY amazing! I put it on, and then cannot stop smelling my hands!

4.) That I am 90% done with Christmas shopping. I mean, we aren’t doing much this year, but we still have three kids, grandkids, etc… But it is awesome that it is barely September and I’m finished!

5.) Elenor! She is a pill these days, but I ADORE her! She makes my top five all day, every day!

What are your top fives this week?