Category: writing

Standing strong…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay3 Comments

I have been without internet for what feels like forever… For the most part, I am ok with not having the online distraction, but i do admit to missing blogging… Quite some time ago my reader got messed up and I lost subscriptions I loved {oh dearest huckdoll} and it honestly feels like months since I’ve had the time to update any blog with any zest, much less read them. Routine, however, is gently sleeping at my feet and I am glad to say those blog filled afternoons may be here… (assuming my internet provider cooperates that is…)

Through the direction of an awesome friend, i ended up signing up for a one word resolution here: http://myoneword.org/… The idea intrigued me. For the past several years I have been theming my years with things like “simplifying”, “loyalty”, and “happiness”, taking on projects or experiences to further my journey towards such things. For some people, these plans may not work but for me they do… This idea though, behind theming more of a personal quest associated with one character word, instead of a years theme. At any rate, I decided to jump on board. i am sure, from time to time, I may mention the journey here- so, for good measure I thought I’d share my word…
UNWAVERING
yep. that’s it.
And you know what, it may seem like a pretty lame word but I’ve got to be honest- it’s kind of scaring the crap out of me a little bit…
in other news, five days into Prescatarianism is awesome. i made THE most amazing tomato soup. Seriously. To. Die. For. For lunch today Gen and I had the best havarti and tomato paninies and for dinner I made zucchini and pepper fajitas. YUM. My veggie loving younin’ told me, this afternoon “I can’t wait for every day’s food, it’s all so yummy!” and it pretty much is…
Then again, it’s day five…
One of us, at some point, my jump out of our second story window screaming “I want steak!!!” (and that someone will be Chw, no doubt about it) but so far there are no complaints. We have talked about, when our 90 day challenge is up, maintaining the lifestyle except for a meated meal once a week. I would rather not, but it’s about compromise I guess…
Now that my baby {canon} is fixed and working, i have taken a ton of recipe shots. It’s just a matter of having time to get them on here… it’ll happen…
While the internet was gone I thought of a dozen great blogs… now that I have internet, this is what you get. Psh. Sorry, guys…

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tree image courtesy of Tree Garden…

I Just Wanna…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay4 Comments

I’ve been thinking a lot on writing, these days…

With complete passion I tackled my NaNo project, last month, with record speed and it felt really good. It felt good to meet the needs of my family and meet a deadline.
And anyone who fancies themselves a writer will complete get it when I say: it simply felt good to write.
Like I was complete.
Interestingly enough, as I’ve mentioned, my work camera died last month as well. In that moment I felt suffocated and had the world’s largest panic attack {which eventually faded, but did reappear from time to time over the week + which followed…} In that time we’ve shopped and shopped and searched for an attainable replacement, I’ve began to question how much I really want this… this photography thing. It isn’t so much the hesitation at shelling out $1200 for a new Canon, (but don’t get me wrong- i refuse to shell out that much money anyway) as much as a questioning of where I’m at with it all. I LOVE doing photos. LOVE it. I love living behind the lens of my camera and all, but do I love doing it as a business? I don’t know.
It’s been really fun, most of the time.
But whenever that inevitable introductory question comes up, you know the one, the: so, what do you do? Well, I very seldom answer: I’m a photographer.
Two years ago, when Chw and I decided to take on the challenge it felt a lot different than it feels now. It was an idea exciting, and artsy and full of energy…
And now?
Now I just want to simplify and feel less pulled…
And honestly, I just want to write.
NaNo felt so good. It re inspired something within me that I haven’t seen for awhile. Easily since before we started RDIM. If I were to be honest, I don’t think I’m successfully able to do both. I am realizing that about myself. Perhaps if I wasn’t a mom, {or even a homeschooling mom, of a child with RAD and hoping to grow our family at least once more…} if I wasn’t a wife… If I wasn’t a lot of things, BUT I am those things and those things come before any interests or passions I have, of my own. I don’t want to be the wife who puts mediocre meals on the table, amidst a chaotically busy week in which I take adequate photos of paying clientel, and then burn the midnight oil typing away some half hearted novel. My way of coping, in the past two years, has simply been to not write.
And it took writing again to really show me how much of me I’ve been missing.
It’s all a lot of deep soul searching that is likely stemming from the fact that I’m functioning of just a few hours of sleep after an incredibly late night followed by a super early morning and a fairly sick kid… hmm…
thoughts?

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Things that keep us going…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay6 Comments

Several months ago, I logged into blogger and realized that my blog was dead.

There had been things that had occurred, in the real life spectrum of things, which had left me uninspired to continue it. Even so, Rainy Day and I had been together for SOOOO long, it seemed incomprehensible to just ax her. So, I held off. I posted infrequently with photos and such, just something to keep her sustained until I knew for sure…

And then NaNo happened, and I realized that I’m not really ready to be done, as a blogger. Because this blog is attached to my name I may be a lot more selective about the information I choose to share AND I have removed quite the majority of my archives- (for that same reason) but I’m not ready to see her go.

And yeah, my blog IS a girl. :) She’s obviously indecisive and quite often emotional- so it makes sense.

I realize I will have to rebuild my readership, which is ok.

NaNo inspired me to actually write again, for the first time in a long time. It restored something inside of me, and apparently just in time. Big things are brewing on the forefront of my life and quite honestly, I can’t imagine braving the storm without blogging…

If you happen to be someone who is still reading, thanks. :) I’ve gotten some really great emails and love in regards to whether or not I’d return here. I can’t tell you what they have meant. I guess essentially that means I can’t imagine braving on, without you…

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At this very moment…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay2 Comments

– I am in love with the cool evenings.

– I am incredibly proud of the fact that I wore a sweater all day.

– ashamed to admit I’m over due for a pedicure.

– I am greatly missing Lucas.

– I am VERY jealous of him, that boot camp has given him the opportunity to go to a kid rock concert this weekend. lucky duck!

– I am wanting a cup of hot apple cider.

– I am wanting to hang out with a girl friend and watch a chick flick.

– I am wishing that maybe I was in Michigan. This has never happened before. It’s weird. I think it’s because I had a deeply intimate vivid dream about my friend last night. Darn it, Tia!!! :)

– I’m happy for the evening I spent with some super cool ladies, and their super cool offspring.

– I am so excited that Parenthood starts next week and that the countdown to Glee is a mere week and a half away.

– I am wishing i were independently wealthy.

– I am wishing a lot of things.

– I am wanting a baby to love, and snuggle, to kiss it’s forehead and keep forever.

– I just wanted to connect with this blog for a minute…

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line dancing…

Published on by Mae @ Rainydayinmay9 Comments
I’ve been thinking a lot about those fine lines that dangle between between this part of my life and others…
Like blogging, for instance.
I love blogging, and I love reading blogs. Among the blogs that i read most frequently are mom blogs, humor blogs, cooking blogs, RAD mom blogs and interior design blogs. All of that is fine because I consider myself a fairly well rounded person, you see… But what about this blog? I don’t necessarily want it to fit into a neatly little labeled box. I don’t want it to be a _____ blog, or a _______ blog. I want it to be a real blog, an honest read filled with many things from recipes to house hold projects, from home schooling stuff to personal and independent stuff that has nothing to do with parenting at all.
Because, the thing is, I’m more than just a mom.
Sometimes I am just a mom, and sometimes I’m an entirely different kind of mom (see RAD). Sometimes I just want to write as a wife, or as a writer. As a photographer or as a girl who loves the culinary life in her kitchen.
A long time ago I had my readership, but then life changed. I changed. I couldn’t keep up with what I’d been before, blog wise. RAD got complicated, life got complicated, I left my job to move out west…
And now, now I sit here not know quite where I fit in. Do I walk away from blogging completely? I hope not, I deeply love this community of women I’ve come to know… But I sort of feel like it’s a tough sell. Some blogs I flock to fervently because they have inspired projects, dazzling stories about celebrities or delectable recipes that I can’t wait to try. With this blog though, I have to expect people simply to want to read it for me. I constantly fear, upon pushing PUBLISH if I’ve mentioned RAD too much, or not spoken enough about recent handbag acquisitions. (thanks, mom!)
I don’t know, I would really love feedback here…

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