family – Page 41

Reasons why it’s been quiet around here, as of late…

Published on September 16, 2013September 16, 2013 by Mae @ Rainydayinmay4 Comments

– I’ve possibly been paralyzed with worry over what will happen to Jesse, and how Breaking Bad will end.

– We had dear friends from Idaho here, visiting, for a week. It was wonderful, but upon their return flight back, I caught a bug of homesickness.

– rainy days followed by heat advisories immediately then followed by 50 degree cold fronts are not friends of my fibromyalgia.

– I ~~did not have Showtime~~ was really busy when Homeland season 2 was on and so we’ve spent the last two weeks catching up, on Demand, to ready ourselves for Season 3. Suffice it to say, the amount of worry I’m feeling plagued with over the fictional characters of Brody & Carrie {and of course Jesse Pinkman and Walter White’s family from BB} are about to push me over the edge. Can we say “too emotionally involved?” Oy…

– I sent my youngest off to a real live life high school. No more homeschool for us. It’s been, well, an adventure, thus far. An adventure that inspires me to question what the cost is to retain both a hairdresser (grey coverage) and a massage therapist… Can they live with me?

– I’ve seen a few really great movies, a surprisingly great movie, a pretty good movie and so movie wise I can’t really complain too much… {Great= The Way Way Back; The Spectacular Now; Surprisingly Great: Austenland; And Pretty Good= The Family.}

– I lost my Kate Spade wallet, which had everything in it. I got it all back, and my faith in humanity was restored both BEFORE the wallet incident AND after… but it was still scary.

– We watched a car catch on fire outside a restaurant- and partially explode. (Same day as the great wallet loss/find)

– My mom found out that she has a degenerative disorder in her back and she is permanently wheel chair bound, leading our family to make some hard decisions in the near future… A lot to think about, for sure.

– My freshman daughter went to not one freshman event, but two. One, where a boy bought her a soda and spent the evening doting on her. She’s pretty much grounded until she’s 76, as she knows better. Such behavior is unacceptable. Soda accepting from boys? Inexcusable!

– I missed my very first PTA meeting, at the very real life high school, because I’m apparently really old and fell asleep on the couch at 6:40 in the evening.

– My favorite person ever won So You Think You Can Dance, which was unexpectedly AWESOME… My second favorite person EVER, did not. This pretty much sucked.

– I was on a crazy, unnecessary medication which was making me crazy sick, every day. I finally got off it last week and feel like I got my life back. Yay!

– I’m on a crazy stupid level in Candy Crush, which has caused me to question my reason for playing the dumb game and why I’ve devoted my time to over 300 levels in the first place since I will NEVER beat this level.

– I have a dozen or so books that I’m dying to read, right now.

– Right now I’m not reading much of anything. Boo.

– I wore a sweater out on a date with my husband the other night. It was pretty much awesome and made me happy.

– I have two online classes that I’m taking right now. I feel pretending they don’t exist is the worst course of action. *sigh*

– Mostly I’m trying to get my bearings and work out a routine. I haven’t been home alone since early 2007, and it’s flat out weird. Then, I worked about 32 hours a week from my home office for two different (local) companies. One was an ad agency and the other was a bigger company with their “hands” in lots of different types of cookie jars. Since 2007 I’ve consistently done something. Typically I did copywriting, or freelance for PR companies or other divisions of the entertainment industry. In 2008 I started a small Lifestyle Portrait business that did pretty well. Towards the end of 2011 though, we had a “family meeting” and I had to admit that I’d taken on too much. I was still freelancing for several entertainment outlets, photography was going strong, I was homeschooling and co-teaching through a local co-op and I was about 4 months into working on a novel. Nothing was really getting the attention it deserved, and I wasn’t really liking any of it. We decided to close the photography business after a wedding I’d booked in January. I felt so much peace about it. It had been a fun journey, but it hadn’t turned out at all like I’d imagined… I dropped most of my freelance accounts. We made the decision to no longer coop homeschool but to distance educate until we could find a suitable high school- and that the main focus (which is where my heart was really at) was the novel. AND HERE I AM… We took, together, all of the steps to get to this place. Not contributing (pretty much at all now) financially, is hard. It stresses me out. It makes me feel guilty…

– I’m feeling really guilty, and pathetic, and ridiculous when I do stupid things like leave my Kate Spade wallet on a bench. (it was worth revisiting twice.) I worked freaking hard for that wallet. A decade ago, i naively believed that when I’d made something of myself professionally, the purchasing of a “Kate Spade” bag (I LOVE her style!) Would symbolize success to me. Pretty much, it didn’t… Funny how, at the end of the day, it’s still just an overpriced handbag. (or wallet) but I certainly don’t want to lose it…

– mostly, I’m wandering around aimlessly. I wash some laundry, back some bread, write a note to stick in the mail, walk the dogs, check my email… Think to myself, this is a great time to finally start playing the cello! because, you know, I’ve always wanted to do that. But I have books unread, and a novel that’s written but in desperate need of being cleaned up… So I ignore it. I don’t know why. All summer long, I knew school would come so my time line was “the second full week of school!”

This is the second full week of school… It is here, today. Now. This minute…

And I just don’t even know where to begin. I feel kind of like that wallet is sitting there all alone on that bench, all over again. Everything important and vulnerable at risk, in the hands of someone else, because I was careless and left it there…

to explain the sugar shortage…

Published on August 26, 2013 by Mae @ RainydayinmayLeave a comment

This weekend recap is brought to you by my iPhone, if for no other reason than I honestly just didn’t want to lug my Canon around all weekend… There. I said it. It’s a sad truth. Mostly we just did running around and I feel like such a tourist when I cart it around to places like Trader Joe’s and the Farmer’s Market. When the irony that most of these photos are at home hits, we’ll just chalk that up to “I’m anal, I didn’t want the post to appear all inconsistent.”

We made it to our favorite local {ish} bakery for their AMAZING homemade donuts, (after a super healthy green smoothie breakfast at home), and bought some of their amazing hamburger buns, as well as some graham crackers and marshmallows to do smores with our friends coming to visit us from Boise this week. Chw and I tried to catch up on Breaking Bad, (and failed) we made it to our Farmer’s Market early enough that we were able to spend the rest of the day doing super necessary things like reading this month’s book club book (me) and drawing fashion designs (Gen). At least Chw was super productive, grooming the dogs and grilling us an awesome dinner…

At our farmer’s market we got the most amazing haul of local produce I’ve ever managed. It was incredible… And, Gen unearthed this ridiculous cookie. If your area of the country discovers a sugar shortage, I’d bet it’s to blame. The pups also got some treats! (Sugarless, of course.)

I wasn’t completely lazy. I did laundry and finished up a small project in our bedroom so I could finally get pictures up on here. (tomorrow).

How was your weekend? Any big plans for the week?

____________________________________________

– a morning lounging in bed a little later, reading, no interruptions or guilt.

– the buzz of construction, the hum of jobs and families surviving and lives going on.

– connecting with a friend two thousand miles away over the little things.

– hand in hand, downtown evening strolls with my husband.

– shared ice cream sundae laughs and family conversations.

– screens to keep the bees out and let them do their jobs where they need to be.

– an out door dinner with friends, laughter and ease.

– bursts of blueberry breakfast bites.

– the great accomplished feeling of productivity.

– news of a strong and healthy heart.

– repeat sunshine days, so seemingly un-Michigan.

– the beauty of roasted beets.

– a day spent cooking, snapping photos and reading.

– our family night dinner plates.

– the fun of making things (meals, memories, projects) with my husband.

{702-717}

Oh, the simplicity…

Published on August 19, 2013August 19, 2013 by Mae @ Rainydayinmay9 Comments

We had one of those truly poignant and lovely weekends where we were blindingly aware that summer was coming to an end while we were trying desperately to just hold on to it… We didn’t get into anything too adventurous or crazy, it was in the simplicity that we grasped so tightly. Friday evening we had dinner with friends, out on the deck, until the mosquitos grew obnoxious and it was just a little too cold to justify staying out there. I was tempted to stay, and had our friends not been on the mosquito’s menu, I may have stayed just to spite the face that a few months from now I’ll wish I would have because I’ll be trapped inside for a Michigan eternity of winter.

We had s Saturday brunch of pancakes bursting with blueberries, Irish Cream coffee followed by no agenda, movies and ice cream sundaes closing the night long after the sun had gone. Sunday was even richer. After church, it was a day spent alternating between making food, taking photos, playing around and laughing, bike rides and reading. So, basically heaven…

We’d grilled kabobs on Friday and since they were so good, we decided to make them again last night, along with a few ears of corn. While I was at the market picking up the corn, I noticed a bundle of beets and threw them in the bin as well. I’ve been wanting to try my hand at roasting them, much to my family’s lack of support. To roast them, we simply cut the tips off, wrapped them in foil and baked them for an hour at 400 degrees. Then kept them wrapped tight until they cooled.

The verdict on the roasted beets was:

Chw= not too bad.

Gen= yum!

Me= good!

I decided to take it a step further and make a crostini with them…

The verdict was:

Chw= good

Gen= not good (she hates goat cheese, she has decided suddenly)

Me= AMAZING!

Roasted Beet Crostini

1 baguette, sliced in 1″ slices

1 pkg. goat cheese (I used Trader Joe’s)

3-4 fresh basil leaves, diced up.

Roasted Beets, sliced thin.

– Grill or toast the bread until it’s slightly crisp.

– spread with goat cheese to desired thickness.

– sprinkle basil on cheese.

– top with sliced beet.

Devour. Amazing…

We paired our dinner with The Dreaming Tree Crush wine because I am a huge Dave Matthews lover and have been dying to try it. It’s really full and I personally enjoyed it, although I’m still more of a sweet wine lover.

This post is full of a trillion little things I’m grateful for… (like those “family night” plates… Aren’t they cute? Genny picked them out, when she was five, so we could have them to eat dinner on special family nights. She used to try to pick out who we were from the people… So cute!) It really just was the best of weekends…

How was your weekend?

under my umbrella…

Published on August 16, 2013August 14, 2013 by Mae @ Rainydayinmay4 Comments

I really loved the internet this week! I think I’m going to try and make a habit, when I find great things, of saving them up to share on fridays, in a kind of collection post of links and all around wonderfulness…

without further ado…

This recipe for Oven Roasted Salmon is AH-MAZING. I’m not kidding. We sat out on our deck moaning about the complete deliciousness of this fish, until our plates were pretty much licked clean, and then we got more salmon and started all over again.

This video is adorable. I sent it to a girlfriend Monday morning because her work week definitely needed a pick me up and she decided she needed both the man and the dog to come help her do yoga at work. *smile*

This guy is the most amazing thing ever. Ever. My world felt better just having gazed upon his face.

This article… While it may initially cause a bit of a stir among more conservative readers, it created an interesting dialogue between my husband and I about our responsibility as parents for unconditional love and when this dad talks about being his daughter’s safe space… I don’t know, it REALLY struck a chord with me. I found his whole article so metaphorical for grace, free will and so often (often out of complete fear) our instinct as parents is the do the opposite of what he’s talking about. There will always be differing opinions, but having a healthy dialogue is a good thing. And sure, as a mom I would’ve wanted nothing more than for my kids to fall in love and commit to one person and only ever be intimate with them. I do believe that leads to less hurt and heartache… It hasn’t worked out quite like that, and at the end of the day I’d rather be the safety place of unconditional love and refuge than that one who will make them feel worse.

This Kid Snippet. Bwa ha ha… “When I come home from work, my wife is angry, what do I do?” “Tell her why!” “ok!”

This isn’t technically “internet” related, but this week’s episode of SYTYCD was by far the most amazing one I have ever seen. I was blown away after nearly every performance. I was moved to tears during multiples numbers. This one though, this had me balling like a baby. I adore Travis and I think his family’s story with Danny is amazing. Beyond that though, I was a huge Robert fan and when he had his accident last year I was devastated. I had no idea he’d be back as an all-star and when I saw his face I literally burst into tears. (this girl obviously gets way too into her tv, eh?) Anyway, you’re welcome…

Which leads us perfectly into this. My absolute favorite dance on the show EVER. (EVER.) Even if you do not like dance, watch it. It’s extraordinary…

I’ve never kept quiet about how much I hate Walmart. Not only do they have completely unethical business practices BUT they treat the majority of their employees like dirty toilet matter. This, this is fact. This is true. This I love. I have known many people on the Walmart side of things and the Winco side of things and this is 100% truth. And Winco grows all the time.

It’s an eclectic mix, to be sure… Some cute, some funny, some thoughtful, some beautiful… Have anything from this week you’d like to share?

I guess, if there is nothing else, I’ll just say “If your wife wants you to buy a trampoline, BUY HER A TRAMPOLINE!” ;)

Reality vs. the movies vs. the rain…

Published on August 7, 2013 by Mae @ RainydayinmayLeave a comment

Rain is great for the soul, I believe. My spirit craves to be out in it, twirling about, completely soaked and feeling blissful. If life were a movie, I would have woken up this morning, grabbed Genny and done just that. We would have danced and laughed, spun and splashed. I would have taken pride in knowing that this was one of those goal/dream-mother/daughter moments we each imagine we’ll have. You know, the kind she’ll remember forever, and set to recreate as special memories with her own children. A building musical montage would indicate that this really was the sort of moment our life as a mother-daughter duo was made of.

Unfortunately for both Genny and I, this morning, life isn’t a movie. The rain, it showers down around us, but real life shines through. Real life in the form of the deep set arthritis in a two-decade old knee injury. It tries it’s best to make me hate the rain, and it it almost succeeds. When it really wants to get the better of me, it works with my migraine riddled brain. Migraine brains hate the rain. Even beyond those things though, what may have been a fun moment, should the elements not have made it unlikely, the things she’s more likely to remember forever are the daily things. Some days have really great things, but she’s fourteen and that makes me the enemy most days. I’m not a fan of that. Most of the time it seems like she isn’t either, but she still goes with it. It’s weird, this teenager thing. I’m pretty sure I’m not doing an awesome job as a mom of a teen. I try to focus that I want her to grow up to be a kind, respectful, educated, empathetic and responsible adult. I figure that if I could focus on those things, maybe the other stuff will be easier to get through. Between you and I, it’s a lot easier to focus on that when she’s being much easier to get along with…

I had a friend with a now 17 year old girl tell me, recently, that 13/14 was the worst. This gives me hope.

And it’s not easy for her either, I know it. I hated being 14. It was my worst age, though thankfully for extremely different reasons. She’s on the brink of starting an entirely new high school where she only knows a couple of kids, and she isn’t really friends with them. That’s a bit of a nerve wracking thing, for sure. But she suffers from the movie syndrome a little, and I think that hurts her more than anything. See, she knows that life isn’t like the movies except for the fact that she expects life to be just like the movies. The friends, the boyfriends, the high school dances and experiences. This summer she had a summer volunteer job and she expected that to be just like the movies show summer jobs to go. It wasn’t, and the disappointment hit her hart. It turned to resentment and the last few days of her time there were spent complaining about the program leader and how awful it was. She expects us to be like a tv family. It’s hard, as parents, to compete with that. No matter what we’ll do, it will always let her star struck expectations down. It will be hard for her, as a person, to deal with the crashing reality of life, whenever she allows that to happen.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about our worlds and how we often imagine them one way just before reality shatters them into being another. I’m not alone in this. There is a reason our nation (and not just our country, I know) has such a plethora of addictions. We are big on denial and pretending. It’s kind of like the town I live in. It’s a beautiful, fairly historic small town. From the look of it, and the way the community practices, it could be one of those “perfect” little towns. It’s absolutely gorgeous, everywhere. But if you lived in my house, for example, you would hear sirens A LOT. Tragic amounts, multiple times, every day. Sometimes to the point of bringing tears to my eyes because there will be so many, for so long, headed to a location near by. But that’s life, and life is the same everywhere. (though if you are my friend, and you are wanting a change, and missing me, this IS the perfect place to live and you should move here now because I am lonely!)

I guess, I’m no different. I instantly beat myself up over how we couldn’t go dance and play in the rain, which Gen’s tv mom surely would have done with her, BEFORE BREAKFAST even (that would have been warm pancakes with homemade blackberry syrup and likely not blueberry toast and tea.) which isn’t all that different. Maybe I’m not expecting my life to be just like the movies, but I’m obviously expecting more from myself than my reality can be.

To do list today:

– Be more graceful, in my head, with me.

– Remember the goal is the type of adult Gen becomes.

– enjoy the rain, however possible.

– clean my office (seriously… It’s a train wreck in here. That’s what I get for avoiding it for 6 weeks.)

– do something creative, of some fashion.

– charge my DSLR and stop taking pictures, only with my iPhone. Seriously.