I’m afraid to say it…

I literally spent the weekend, on the couch unbelievably sick, watch Season 1 of the OC. I totally want to say I am not proud, but I love this show so completely much that it makes me a little proud.
And a little sad that I missed it when it was airing.
But really, I LOVE it. Great writing. Great story. NOTHING like those traditional sex fest teen soaps…

Anyway, on that note (and the fact that I’m still feeling completely horrible), i will simply follow this with today’s letter…

This letter could be for you…


For every person that I never mustered up the courage to talk to, though I deeply wanted to, due to my insecurities and all round ridiculously inhibited self… I tell myself, every time that I will regret my decision to stay quiet.
I do regret it, every time…


I ask myself, what if they’re hurting? What if they need a friend? But who am I kidding, really? It is really out of my own completely selfish desire for friends that I want to say hello, and also why I don’t.
Fear.
Fear of eventual rejection.
Fear of heart break.
Fear of loneliness.
I guess that is why people say that fear is crippling. It paralyzes those it chooses…


The thing is, dear stranger, that I want to know you. I want to know of the things that trouble you. I want to know of the things that delight you. I want you to know that, should you truly need someone, I would faithfully be there for you.


Ironically though, how would you know that since I couldn’t even say hello?


At least I’ve thought about it, right?


M

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