On Fridays I like to join with other writers at the FMF community and practice a five-minute writing challenge around the collective word. It has been a bit since I’ve done it, due to this pesky sickness I’ve had since November. This week I’m back at it, and ironically, the prompt is BETTER…
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Better has become this fictitious scale by which I am both consciously and subconsciously weighing everything.
I’m feeling better.
Well, I was feeling better.
My chest sounds better, but my (fill in the blank here because, let’s be honest, what hasn’t been affected at this point?) does not feel better.
Better…
It carries over into so many things.
Into ALL of the things…
The weather’s comparisons involve the use of our word, whichever way I lead. These days I’m sensitive to how often I am choosing this B-word, and questioning if- for me- it has become some vague and insincere word, overused and under considered. Perhaps better is the new 90’s like, this year. (like totally…)
I don’t know.
At this point, ten weeks in, I want to feel better, sound better, look better, be better…
And there it is: Better represents something bigger, something other. Something prettier, healthier, wealthier… Something unattainable, unrealistic and perhaps more unicorn in existence than reality. I am healthier than a month ago, but perhaps within myself there will always be something more, something better, that I am striving for and that is not a strive I want to be content in chasing after. How, with eyes set on better, does one find the simplicity and beauty in now?
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(Ironically I’ve been working on a post for next week about a topic very close to this, which is why my brain went in this direction. For a polar opposite sort of encouragement, check out our latest episode of the Collective Podcast, where we talk about what makes you not only truly beautiful, but also feel beautiful! (and guess what- it’s not what you think!)
When you’ve been floored with a virus, it can take SO long to get well – to feel better. I think we compare our old levels of energy and just assume that we’ll be right back to those levels immediately. Hope you can indeed feel better soon!
it is taking FOREVER! And yes… absolutely expect to “bounce back”! THANK YOU!!!
“Better” is so relative, isn’t it? Thanks for coming over to my house today!!!
YES! and thank you :)
YES! This: “Better has become this fictitious scale by which I am both consciously and subconsciously weighing everything.” That was spot on. A fictitious scale. Brilliant.
Erica, first of all i LOVE your URL. love it! Second, thank you… The more I wrote and thought about it, the more I accepted how unfair/unrealistic the word truly is.
Like, totally cool post, Misty, and we’re praying for your ‘better’!
as always, Thanks, Andrew!
Oof, I didn’t realize how loaded the word “better” was. You’re absolutely right! Too often, better really means best, and that’s just perfection in disguise. Perhaps a better way to word it would be “growth.” That, at least, acknowledges the effort behind the change while also leaving room for more growth as needed/wanted.